THERE WILL BE TALES TO TELL!!

I will be a hanging with an amazing crowd of fabulous writers from the world of blogdom.

There will be tales to tell and I hope I do not blackout due to the beauty that will be right in front of my schmeyes!

Drinking ( I am not real good at this one ), chatting like wild hyenas ( great at this ), and a little thing I like to call cockroaching/Kareoke...no I don't care how it is spelled (and yes I am good at this one ). It should be a wild ride!

I will miss my man thing, but it will only be two nights. TWO NIGHTS! ON MY WEEKEND! It will be fine, I got extra lucky last weekend and got him two nights out of turn, so I can not cry in my milk.

I will try to post some tales of grandure upon my return, but as you can tell...the writing...it has taken a back seat to the job and the man.

Love you all!

Why she is missing

You may be thinking "where the hell-o has Miss Understanding been?" Well I have been enjoying the benefits of sticking my little neck out there in adventure land.

Let us just say I have been too busy having sex...wait who reads my blog...okay well like anyone who has seen me lately and cannot tell I am getting a good rogering then they are just not paying attention. And figuring out when we can get together for our naked rendezvous you know with all the kids and animals it is a wonder we are not getting more sleep.

ANYWAY I saw this on one of my favorite sites and decided to borrow it as it is an omen of things to come for me...

So guess what you would like, I am happy and will not let anyone spoil my fun. And yes I know I only started talking to him on the puter in October and met in person in November...but when you are sure you are sure. Do you think I have been sitting on the sidelines NOT making a massive list of what the man has to have to be considered worthy? Well trust a crazy bitch...I have been.

So here I am, under rested, over farked and blissful :)

Good luck with your life and if you are searching for your perfect split apart...well don't give up!

BRILLIANT....MOMMY WANT

SRSLY! Where have all the inventors been? This idea is making me cream my jeans...wait maybe that is my boyfriend...nope I think it is this idea.

Okay it might be 50/50, ANYWAY I want these so if you feel like being a generous cyber friend please put $$'s toward or send my a size 6 of the sophisticated ones:)

Watch the ENTIRE video...just when you think it is some sort of witchcraft and magic prestidigitation you can almost see how they do it!!


EEEEEEeeeeeee!!! I think I am fortunate to be born in such a time as this.

In case you did not figure it out please clickety-click the title!!

The Adventures have ended.

I know it sounds sad, but really not so much. One of the peeps below that responded to my post for datables has just about won my heart. I am in lust at least if it is not something else. HO-LEE And to think I initially blew him off becuase he had AOL (which still pisses me off, trust). Anyway just wanted to post and update and let you all know that all posts from here on out will have nothing to do with any adventures in dating. I know, you were all thinking THANK GAWD ALREADY.

And just to be clear if this is not the love of a lifetime then I am pretty much done and will not be 'nexting' anymore dudes I am tired. They are far too much work and I do not like myself when I am out "looking around."

Okay, real quick before I sign off and try desperately to think of something engaging to write about.

My last boyfriend (crossing fingers) is so cute, just what the doctor ordered for me, just like God listened to all my hopes and sent them in a nice package. By the way, no Christmas gifts required I got mine early.

Okay, I am seriously boring so be on your way to find something interesting to read.

Adventure Island

HA! Now I remember why I quit dating all those years ago!

Yes it is because I don't like myself when I am dating...no really I don't! I all think I am some mature person who can be detached and devil may care. BWAHAHAHAHA! Right.

I have had some adventures and learned some interesting lessons. I started out all good, resolute on what I wanted and what I would not put up with in order to not spend lonely nights...or should I say lonely non work and non sleep times all by my fricking self...or worse just with adult children because really! GAH!!!

I have been out with more than one dude and it has been fun, trust I know I may have to kiss a couple of frogs before a find a semi-prince type human that I can stand to be around. And kissed I have done, I actually forgot how much fun the whole snoggin' thing was and besides a run in with the Police at 2:30 in the AM all has been good. No I will not reveal anymore than...parks close around here at 10:30 pm...after that you can expect a random visit from three Police cars all at once. Gulp, I have not been this em-bare-assed since I was a teenager, still a little red faced when I think about it.

Anyway...back to what I do not like about myself when dating. I like to be in control, you know the boss of all that happens. Now this can be true in some parts of a relationship but as you know not all parts, UGH. I want to get together when I want, to kiss when I want, to be called when I want, to be communicated with when I WANT. I WANT I WANT I WANT.

I am aware that this is not a real mature attitude...so hence the me not liking myself. I have found that I get a little insecure if I am not communicated with...specially after spending some time with a dudicle.

I am sure that I am not liking men and the whole I need to go back in my cave and think about "stuff." Whatever the hell that is! I just want to have fun and play around until I say it is no longer fun and therefore bu-bye. Hmmm, now that I say this...I may need to say bu-bye to another one.

And before you ask, no they do not know I have a blog...and we can only hope they have not stumbled onto it...gulp. Boy if they didn't figure out I was a biatcha before this blog would clear up any misconceptions.

Well I am off to check the lines of communication and see if the next lucky gentleman has answered my invitation. Baye!

We are doing the Adventure thing...

Well hello...I realized I have not updated you on my interesting progress in the adventures with men field.

WELL there have been some developments here...first Mr bryce man has vanished off the scene; bad choice on his part as I had decided to use him and toss him out. He would have really enjoyed the "use him" part but alas...you have to live with your bad choices and missed opportunities (him not me). btw- he does communicate every once in a while to try and keep the hook set so he can use me as a "fall back" if whatever else is putting a tickle in his drawers doesn't work out. Little does he know he has lost all chances of fun with me and my girls.

SO I when I was all in the decision phase (you know to use or not to use) with the B man, this other chap showed back up on the scene from the original batch of good, bad and uglies. And we have seemed to hit it off...well at least so far, it seems to be the whole meeting up with someone where they find out how big my chesticles really are that skeeres the holy crap out of them...I think (or at least this is what I choose to believe so don't crush my dreams, kay?).

Let's recap a bit shall we; Mr. B gone, Mr. M back in picture and full on communication mode (I think this is the part I really enjoy the most) and whilst this door has opened I decided that maybe I had been a little hasty pudding with some of the unsuspecting chaps below, so in true non-wallflowery form, I sent some tendrils out to see if I could re-hook one or two of them.

Can you recap a recap? Anyway here we go...The count is now one re-hooked and one is full communication mode; I AM sitting here with satisfied grin on face and mischievous thoughts in mind.

OH, OH! *jumping up and down* I almost forgot the newest and freakiest part!! There is this chap with a wonderful accent that used to be a part of my life....and he oddly shows up and announces that he is getting divorced and potentially will be open to exploring new adventures and is asking me about my "adventures."

GA-GA-GA... this man has made me weak in the knees since the first time I met him all that long while ago...so of course my ears perked up (maybe something else as well) and I am now in hypersonic mode every time I think I might run into him at all the usual places. Gulp. We will see, we will see my dearie.

As you can tell i just cannot decide who, where or when...keep posted to find out who is next to win the coveted "use him" award and who is on the road to long term fulfillment with a winning me:)

DIALED WAY UP!

Yes I am on a high like you would not beleeeed. I have a huge event coming up this weekend and will be working everyday this week and next (at least it is time and a half). So between all the last minute cancellations for staffing and not knowing WHERE THE HELL all my people are going to park and figuring out if my counterparts got all the supplies together. Well let's just say AMPED to the max!

I was out last night at 7:45 picking up forgotten items (grrrr) and I usually am finished with work by 4:30, ugh. And I had to pick up hair ties for all the crackers that will show up with long hair flowing whilst serving food (yuck).

AND I apparently am also a chauffeur for this event along with a shuttle driver and organizer!! GAH! I have some really choice words for the person that put this event together...as my boss so kindly pointed out, he did not care to take it upon himself to verify parking and some other KEY, fricking KEY information for this event...DUDE, if you are the planner, don't ask us to do your entire job, or DON'T take on the task. I do not like stuff being done a)half arsed and b)at the last FARKING MOMENT!!

I will be kicking ass and taking names later!! Dude nobody believes me when I say we are getting in on Saturday setting up and getting out! I am NOT into lollygaging around and no fricking dragging feet under my tutalidge.

Thank you all for letting me get this off my GINORMOUS chest and vent like crazy!

If you listen closely this weekend and you are in Arizona...you may here people responding to me with YES DRILL SERGEANT!!